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Fixtures and Results, 2010-11

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The Renegades Players.

The player

The position

The notes

The face
Bill Agg   Nickname:
Position:
DOB:
Age:
Weight:
Found on the pitch:

John Bateson

Usually on a push bike or somewhere in the backs

 Nickname: JB
Position: Fullback, Fly-half
DOB:
Age:
Weight:
Found on the Pitch:
Seasons Aim:

Graham Beckford

Hooker, back row

Nickname: Beaky
Position: Hooker, Back row
DOB:
Age:
Weight:
Found on the Pitch:
Seasons Aim:

Chris Beddow

Back

Nickname: Flora
Position: Scrum-half, Centre
DOB: 11th December 1959, so that makes me ……………….YOUNGER THAN RIK!
Age:
Weight: You’ll have to, cos I’ve not been training
Found on the Pitch: Only if you let me on, but picking up the balls Darey can’t reach
Seasons Aim: To meet the Belgian Chocolate Twins!

Surf dude and near full time winner of the Man-Love trophy

Rob Bevington  

Nickname: Wow, look at Rob breaking tackles for fun! / Schmooo
Position: Have tried them all and found none that suit, let's try Prop.
DOB: 5th May 1925 (Oil of Olay, my personal sponsor...twice a day!)
Age: is just a number
Weight: has recently become a problem....16 stone on the hoof!
Found on the Pitch: debating whether football may have been a safer choice this season!
Seasons Aim: World Peace and a stop to Famine and Poverty, otherwise just to survive the tour as a VIRGIN and not have to share a room with Jonty, I cannot be responsible for my actions!

Antony Brown   Nickname: Ant
Position: Where I'm told to play
DOB: 16.03.78
Age: 30
Weight: 15st ish
Seasons Aim: To play a whole game

Will Cleare


Nickname: Will, Oi or Noo-Daddy (just made that one up…quite catchy though, may keep it?)
Position: Centre or Untenable - depending on how the hands have been working!
DOB: 18th January 1974 – that’s right Matt, I even make you look old!
Age:
Weight: 15st 9ilbs (was 16st 4lbs until a few weeks ago so training is paying off)
Height: 6ft 2in
Inside Leg: 23”
Waist: 38”
Chest: 42 A
Found on the Pitch: swearing at myself for missing another tackle/pass (delete as applicable)
Seasons Aim: Apart from working out if being Noo-Daddy (yep definitely got a ring to it) will balance with rugby commitments, to score a legitimate try this season to add to the fine knocked-on-but-allowed effort in the last game of last season
Beauty tips: ensure at least one member of squad/team (delete squad if reading this after first 2 games) has brought enough moisturiser to go around and save Jonty the embarrassment of having to ask again…ONE TEAM BOYS!

Richard Cowley Prop Nickname:
Position:
DOB:
Age:
Weight:
Found on the Pitch:
Seasons Aim:

Chris Edwards  

Nickname: Psycho
Position: Back row
DOB: ?
Age: ??
Weight:
Found on the pitch: Being given a yellow card
Seasons Aim:

Stuart Faben Captain Nickname:
Position:
DOB:
Age:
Weight:
Found on the Pitch:
Seasons Aim:

Carl Goodey

Back row

Nickname:ZigZag
Position:Addenbrooke's / Desk
DOB:Irrelevant... "i am not a number"
Age:As young as i feel...
Weight:Settling into a comfortable 30's waistline
Found on the Pitch:Apologising for another penalty
Seasons Aim:To cause excruciating pain to the creators of The BBC's 'Hole in the Wall'

'Sir' to his friends

Jay(son) Hall

Wing/back row

Nickname: Come on boys what are they?
Position: 0pposite side of the pitch to jonty
DOB: 05/07/81
Age:
Weight: lightest renegade?? 76 kg
Found on the Pitch:
Seasons Aim: ????????no injuries!!

Mark Holdsworth   Nickname:
Position:
DOB:
Age:
Weight:
Found on the Pitch:
Seasons Aim:

Daray Horn

Fly Half

Nickname: "D"
Position: Fly-Half
DOB:
Age: 34
Weight: 95kg
Found on the Pitch: Screaming at the scrum-half
Seasons Aim: 5 drop goals

Roger McGachan   Nickname:
Position:
DOB:
Age:
Weight:
Found on the Pitch:
Seasons Aim:

Chris Milne

Back row

Nickname: The Glove
Position: Back Row
DOB: 19/10/1984
Age: 25.
Weight: Finally hit the 80kg mark.
Found on the Pitch: In the air or on face down in the mud usually one straight after the other.
Seasons Aim: To better each no7 I come up against.

Eddie Murphy  

Nickname: Bill Bob, Billy Bob, Butter fingers, etc?
Position: Wing (trying to keep warm waiting for the forwards to let the ball out ? waiting for Godot), or full-back
DOB: Lost in the mists of time
Age: Half way to ninety
Weight: Need more for rugby and less for the rest of my life
Found on the pitch: Perfecting my favourite move ? the panic- stricken kick to touch
Seasons Aim: Not to crack any ribs and to play my best game for Renegades this season (and not against Renegades for some other team I have been lent to)

Shannon Neyland Prop

Nickname:
Position: Utility prop
DOB: 25/03/1978
Age: 31
Weight: 20.7 st
Found on the pitch: Trailing the breakdown less and less every game
Seasons Aim: To get to the breakdown

Relando Pesci

Wherever he can cause mayhem

Nickname:
Position:
DOB:
Reason for retirement:
Other information:


Ren Pesci

Back row

 Nickname: Pesc
Position: Back Row, Hooker
DOB: Far too young.
Age:
Weight:
Found on the Pitch: Diving into the action. Hands in a ruck or hooking against the head!
Seasons Aim: To make as many games as possible, assuming the garden doesn't need weeding or the dog needs walking.

Rik Relph

Front row, second row, father of the team (Old Bastard), President of Renegades Rugby Union Football Club.

Nickname:
Position: Front Row
DOB: 1958
Age:
Weight:
Found on the Pitch:
Seasons Aim:

Aging gracefully as he descends from the dizzy heights of Aylesbury (or somewhere) RUFC

Lloyd Smart   Nickname:
Position:
DOB:
Age:
Weight:
Found on the Pitch:
Seasons Aim:

Brian Smith   Nickname:
Position:
DOB:
Age:
Weight:
Found on the Pitch:
Seasons Aim:

Ritz Steytler

Back row

Nickname: Ritzie
Position: Backrow
DOB: 28 August 1979
Age:
Weight:
Found on the Pitch: Hopefully where the ball is otherwise lying where I last fell gasping for breath or keeping the backs company
Seasons Aim: To get through the season uninjured and get fitter to play a better game

Ben Sutton   Nickname: Jack (of all trades) otherwise known as Master (of none)
Position: I don’t know yet but I hope it’s on the pitch
DOB: 5/12/77
Age: 29
Weight: 87 Kg
Found on the pitch: on the wrong end of the opposition after “The Glove” has given them some attention

Matt Turner   Nickname:
Position: Back
DOB:
Age:
Weight:
Found on the pitch:

Sam Vail

Front row, second row

 Nickname:Fat Bastard
Position: Front Row
DOB: 1967
Age:41
Weight:120KG
Found on the Pitch: 10 yards behind the action or hanging on the wing (my mental position)
Seasons Aim: To score a try and to appear in every single Match Report!

Tom Wykes

Front row / Back row / Utility

Nickname: Tucker, but Ren calls me Sam and a few other have started to do that too.
Position: Tight head Prop.
DOB: 28th September 1964 and feeling every bit of it.
Age:
Weight:
Found on the Pitch:
Seasons Aim: